The Retirement
by Nova-chan
Summary: German happy song translation: It's a piccolo world, after all....
1. Default Chapter

The Retirement!!  
  
By Super NoV!  
  
E-mail: IlovemenoV@aol.com  
  
Series: Slayers  
  
Rating: G  
  
Summary: While the Slayers are at Disney World, L-sama decides she's ready to retire and give her job to her favey red-head. But, will the others by so willing to give Lina up?  
  
  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
In an extremely comical display, a glowy blond-haired woman walks into her living room. The room is full of trash. She turns on the TV. She flicks from channel to channel and finally finds a good talk show on.  
  
Then, her cell phone rings. "WHADDAYAWANT??" she demands of the other end of the line.  
  
"Um..err, Miss L-sama?" a squeamish voice wonders, meekly.  
  
"WHAT?? YOU'RE WASTING MY TIME!" L-sama shrieked back at him.  
  
"Well, um..we need you to do something for us, please??"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Our..um..toilet is backed up and we can't fix it?"  
  
L-sama slammed the phone on the table. "Incompetence!"  
  
  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
"Here we are! The place of fun and excitement! Mystery and intrigue! Food and games! Rides that make you spew your guts all over the freshly cut grass and decoratively-placed floral arrangements! Disney World! The most magical place on earth!" Gourry squeaked, his face just millimeters from Xelloss', as the mazoku continuously slid back from the insanely-happy blond.  
  
"Is that so?" he asked, still sliding away. "Well, that's wonderful."  
  
"Isn't it??"  
  
"I'm just going to sit here. HERE. Here on this bench," Zelgadis stressed. "I'll be here when all of you are finished destroying brain cells doing whatnot out there. Here. There. So, leave me alone and go there while I stay here."  
  
"Silly Mr. Zelgadis!" Amelia chirped, taking his arm and dragging him off of the bench. "Out there? It's fun! Here is boring and silly."  
  
"I like boring..maybe not silly," he retorted.  
  
"Come on! We hafta ride the happy song ride until our brains slide out of our ears!" the oujo exclaimed.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOO-"  
  
"Well, come on, Gourry," Lina said. "We're gonna go pig out!"  
  
"But I wanna go with Xelloss and ride the Alien!" Gourry whined, clinging to the priest's arm.  
  
Lina huffed. "Well, fine! I'll just go to the food court myself and I'll eat EVERYTHING and there'll be nothing left for you!!"  
  
"Oh-kay!" the blond exclaimed, waving. "See ya later!"  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
"Come on, Mr. Zelgadis! This is gonna be so much fun!" Amelia cried, tugging him into a small, dolphin-shaped boat with her.  
  
"Amelia," he wailed, softly, "I feel like everyone is staring at me and making crude comments.."  
  
"What makes you think that?"  
  
"Hey! Look at the grown man with blue hair riding the happy song ride!"  
  
"That."  
  
"Oh.."  
  
  
  
**  
  
Lina stuffed food into her mouth, viciously. "Stupid Gourry..ditching me..I'm gonna eat until I feel better..waiter, more food, pronto!!"  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
"Here we are, waiting in line to wait in line to get tickets to wait in line for the greatest ride EVER!!" Gourry announced to Xelloss, who sweatdropped at the sight of this line.  
  
"Gourry," he began, "I hate to tell you this, but we probably aren't going to be able to ride the Alien today."  
  
"Oh, sure we are!" Gourry said, happily, whacking his 'buddy' on the back. "Even if we have to wait here all night, camped out in sleeping bags, we're gonna ride the Alien!!!"  
  
"That's what I was afraid of," Xelloss commented, sweatdropping again.  
  
  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Nova-chan: And, that's a wrap!  
  
Xelloss: WHAT??  
  
Nova-chan: For the firstie chappie!  
  
Zelgadis: Great. We're now doing 'chappies.'  
  
Lina: Poor me, all alone and sad..but, with food.  
  
Nova-chan: I had to do it, not only to feed my XelxGoo obsession-  
  
Xelloss: (cringe)  
  
Nova-chan: --but to make way for L-sama to kidnap you!  
  
Lina: ..you never told me about this!!  
  
Nova-chan: It has to happen so she can have you alone, to-  
  
Xelloss: Kids, cover your ears-err, eyes.  
  
Nova-chan: No, no, you silly thing! It's not a wicky ficcie!  
  
Gourry: What's a wicky ficcie?  
  
Nova-chan: A yuri.  
  
Gourry: What's a yuri?  
  
Nova-chan: A femxfem.  
  
Gourry: Like the kingdom of Femille?  
  
Nova-chan: Sort of..btw, if it was supposed to be an all-female city, how did they have children? Did they KNOW that some people were male?  
  
Xelloss: I don't think you wanna know.  
  
Zelgadis: (shudder) Miwan..  
  
Nova-chan: Anyway, I'll continue this story if I get..umm..100 reviews! Muahaha!!  
  
Xelloss: Are you kidding? You'll never get it finished! (which isn't a bad thing, btw.)  
  
Nova-chan: No, just joshing. I only need 50 reviews!  
  
Xelloss: Nova-chan.  
  
Nova-chan: Oh-kay, but at least five!! Or no more story! 


	2. NoV thanks you!

The Retirement Part 2  
  
**  
  
Nova-chan: ;_;  
  
Xelloss: What? What's the problem?  
  
Nova-chan: Nothing. ;_;  
  
Zelgadis: Come on, out with it.  
  
Nova-chan: ...TODAY WAS MY FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL AND IT WAS REALLY HARD!!!!!  
  
Xelloss: (recovering) Ear..  
  
Nova-chan: ;_; I had homework already and I had a bad headache, and I didn't see Alex except for three times, and I only had half a class with Kimi-san, and I didn't like anybody in two classes, and I passed out in chemistry because I got dehydrated, and I **started** and-  
  
Xelloss: Too much information!!  
  
Nova-chan: Oh, sorry. Forgot you were a boy.  
  
Lina: That's a fairly easy thing to do.  
  
Nova-chan: I'm just gonna get back to doing the one thing that makes me feel better than sleeping. I'm gonna write the next part of this ficcie.  
  
  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Lina took a big bite out of whatever was closest to her. After a while, it didn't matter, since everything started to taste the same.  
  
However, the second she felt the nightmare energy hovering and gathering behind her, all of her food, whether in her hand or in her mouth, was dropped.  
  
  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, back at the happy song ride...  
  
"It's a small world after all...it's a small world after all..."  
  
"Amelia, I'm going to die," Zelgadis groaned, trying to get over his nausea.  
  
"But, Mr. Zelgadis! They're so kawaii!" Amelia squeaked, grasping his arm. "Next, they'll start singing in some other language!"  
  
"It's a chibi world after all..."  
  
"Amelia. I would like to get off. NOW," Zelgadis stressed.  
  
"But, Mr. Zelgadis! It's romantic!"  
  
"Amelia."  
  
"Oh-kay."  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Gourry waited, anticipating, as the line got shorter every thirty minutes or so. Xelloss began to slowly lose his sanity and started whistling a haunting tune.  
  
A woman standing in front of them was nervously teetering back and forth on her heels.  
  
She suddenly ripped off her shirt and screamed, "I can't take it anymore!!!"  
  
Gourry gasped. "Aaah!" he shrieked, covering Xelloss' eyes with his hand. "Don't look! It's a bra!"  
  
"What??" Xelloss demanded. "Gourry! Stop it!"  
  
The misguided mazoku tumbled over backwards, bringing Gourry down with it.  
  
The woman had long since been carried off by security.  
  
"Ah," the blond sighed. "The crisis is over."  
  
"Yes," Xelloss agreed, squished, "but we lost our place in line."  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
"Are you..." Lina whispered, unable to finish.  
  
"The Lord of Nightmares," L-sama replied, her golden hair glowing brightly. "You can call me LoN." (Like NoV! ^_^)  
  
"But, what do you want from me?" Lina choked out.  
  
"Well, my dear," L-sama said, plopping into a chair and ordering a cappuccino, "I'm getting too old to be the Lord of Nightmares. I keep telling them I'm retired, but do they listen?? NO!! They're always calling me and wanting something! You won't believe how simple they are!"  
  
"Um, excuse me," the flame-haired girl interrupted, "but who are they?"  
  
"Um..." LoN thought for a moment. "I have no idea, my child, but down to business, I want you to be my replacement!"  
  
"What????" Lina's jaw dropped. "But, I-"  
  
"No buts!" L-sama roared. "Just come with me."  
  
And, with that, the nightmare energy began to entwine around the small sorceress.  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
"Why don't we go find Miss Lina and the others?" Amelia asked, once they had escaped from the ride.  
  
"Fine by me," Zelgadis replied.  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Gourry wailed, as he and Xelloss sat by the fountain, featuring a giant, happy mouse.  
  
"It's not FAIR!!" he cried. "The Alien is my favorite ride EVER!!"  
  
"You'll survive!" Xelloss assured him.  
  
"No, I won't," the blond sniffled.  
  
"Why don't we go get some lunch?" the priest suggested. "After that we can get back in line."  
  
"Oh-kay!" Gourry cried, suddenly very happy again.  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Zelgadis and Amelia arrived in the food court that was by this point covered in nightmare energy.  
  
Amelia gasped. "LoN is taking Miss Lina!" She posed. "Justice will prevail!" The oujo began a fireball while Zelgadis prepared a Ra Tilt.  
  
At that point, Xelloss and Gourry showed up.  
  
"Hi Lonny!" Xelloss greeted, cheerily.  
  
The golden energy dissipated and Lina was dropped to the ground.  
  
"Xelloss!" L-sama exclaimed. "How are you doing?"  
  
"Oh, just fine!" the mazoku replied.  
  
".."  
  
".."  
  
"Should we start fighting again?"  
  
"Probably."  
  
The energy returned and Lina was lifted again. Her hair began to glow, along with her body.  
  
"No!" she shrieked, struggling. "Help me, you bakas!!"  
  
Zelgadis and Amelia attacked, but their blasts just bounced off of L-sama, like she was a giant marshmallow.  
  
Gourry had busied himself with some foods that Lina had left on the table.  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed that right above L-sama was a squirrel.  
  
But, not just any squirrel.  
  
He gasped. "Squirrelly!! My mortal enemy!" He chucked a chicken leg at the animal, but his aim was off and he hit L-sama instead, who fell down and died on impact, dropping Lina.  
  
Gourry blinked and looked around nervously. "Oops."  
  
  
  
**  
  
  
  
Amelia: How romantic! Mr. Gourry-san saved the day!  
  
Lina: You can't say 'Mr. Gourry-san.' It's too repetitive.  
  
Amelia: But I hafta show respect!  
  
Zelgadis: No. You don't.  
  
Amelia: :P  
  
Xelloss: I liked this one. Nothing bad happened to me!  
  
(suddenly Xelloss is struck by lightning)  
  
Xelloss: (cough)  
  
Nova-chan: Oops! BTW, I want Amelia-story ideas this time! She's never had her own story.  
  
Amelia: ;_; It's true!  
  
Nova-chan: But the next one is Amelia-story.  
  
Amelia: I'm so flattered!  
  
Nova-chan: Wait! ;_; I just read my reviews for the first part of this ficcie, and I wanted to thank my fans! ;_; I got ten reviews in all! ;_; You all helped me get over my bad school trauma thingies! Thank-you! Thank- you! I'm dedicating my next fic to the fans!!! 


End file.
